The past few weeks social media platforms has been raided with red flags and topics that warrant the waving of each one. I saw topics from relationships/friendships to work place etiquette. The red flag is so symbolic and triggering for me. As I have ignored plenty of red flags and currently paying for that decision now. I have been very quiet and somewhat private since February 2021. I honestly had nothing to say...nothing to give. Depressed chile...
It was one random cold night that I realized I was forcing a life I didn't really have. I made everything okay for the sake of making it work. I thought I was complete. Some would even say content but I was not happy at all. At the time I was not pleased about my career, my health, my brand, friendships, and most importantly my marriage. Like most people I started doing something about it. As I have spoken about in previous blog posts I started Keto and maintained that lifestyle for several months losing a total of 66 pounds. Was it hard? YES! A whole struggle and half to be exact but I had a goal... to live better...to feel better... to be better.
My friends are great but depression had me feeling alone. I was making up issues in my mind to stay away when I really needed a hug most days. I would smile and go with the flow but I just wasn't feeling it until I decided to seek help and simply choose not to be defeated. As a result of said times I was not motivated at all to blog, to post regularly on social media, to encourage grieving Daddys girl...I had nothing to give. The red flag in all of this was my ability to fake the funk instead of taking time to deal with me. Therapy is a life saver!!!!
My biggest red flag was unfortunately my marriage. I thought I was happy but I was not. I don't want to share much detail as its never my intent to speak ill of my future Ex-husband. In short, I unknowingly and knowingly ignored some major red flags and could no longer be color blind, unhappy and settled for less than the bare minimum. Am I crushed? Yes. Embarrassed? Yes Have I tried EVERYTHING and been vocal for years about areas of concern? Yes. Did I know about these areas of concern before marriage? Yes. Did I ignore the red flags? Yes. The list can go on and on. Everything happens for a reason. Even when it doesn't feel good. Therapy/ counseling has truly opened my eyes to the various red flags in my life and the journey to correcting them has begun.
Depression comes and goes with the transitions of life. Happy to say Im free from it hence why I was able to share this post with you. I cant end without encouraging somebody...Nobody knows you better than you. Fully assess what and who makes you happy and cultivate that fully. DO NOT SETTLE. It's okay if you don't have anything to give at the moment. Most importantly DO NOT IGNORE THE RED FLAGS in your life. The price is too much to pay...your peace is priceless.
Much love and green flags only,
Alicia V.
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